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Folks, bitching about women but not checking in on what they are experiencing will mean your reality does not change! A lot of you men about women not being real, or of being flakes. Ungently, you accuse us of being bots and whores. I'd like to explain some of this dynamic, as a very real woman with follow through. I have never had to work so hard for the follow through before! All of your are echoed by ours, and we have experiences just like yours, along with some extra challenges on top. I've tried to have compassion by learning what you guys experience, but at this time I'm too exhausted by the frustration of what I have experienced specific to being a female seeker. My own hiccupy access was hard on men; but the way it is up on the list works against successful connections unless it's truly a zipless fuck of a 20 minute in/out kind. Maybe if I share some details of what women posters deal with, it will help us all. I've compared notes with women of all different ages and capacities. We get stormed by literally hundreds of responses to any post - many are vicious men with rage who attack because someone else made them angry and frustrated; many are thugs who text poorly spelled one-liners and never put more effort out than that; many immediately send dick shots; many, many demand our " " before offering any view of themselves even though THEY are asking US for attention! There was one guy who sent me pictures of someone else's dick, body, face and the rest because even after weeks of communications he still thought I was a bot (seriousl??); and the other guy who right away offered me money because he was certain anyone who sounded so fun had to be whore. Lots of you married men were nice about it when I said a kind "no thanks", but many more were nasty, and continued emailing - and of you actively lied to me and engaged me deeply at length until I was able to figure you out. A bunch of you pressured for your half-hour afternoon fuck over and over again even though I was clear that evenings and some mutual attention were first-date deals. Most of you failed out because our schedules are so busy it was tough to hook up, but only a minority of you communicated that you had wandered off, despite efforts to clear that up and move on to next appropriately. True , boys. Each time we respond to you and all the rest, it takes time and focus, energy. Those of us who are real but not stupid want to ensure a small bit of safety - you get to know a little about a person before you open it up. Each one of you that is genuine and honest is flanked by 20-30 guys who waste our time with hatefulness, attitude, , lack of effort and also by simply no longer responding, after having sucked up a lot of our energy (that might have gone to you). Then there are the time-wasters who draw us away from engaging those of you who MIGHT follow through: the fantasizers who were never going to move past jacking off or indirect contacts; married men who lie and say they are not after we say we do not fuck married men; guys who engage us intensely (oh there is a long list of you boys and men I am dying to lay out right here, but I don't do that) and then just drop out, leaving US to clean up after that and try to figure out that you suddenly left the conversation; those of you who make dates and break them late or do not show; those of you who play endless behind your fake screen names and demand so much for so little. We are all here to give and take some little pleasure. But you must understand: every real woman who posts is stormed by hundreds of men, most of whom are tragiy broken creatures in the upshot. We have to carefully weed those out, try to be respectful to the ones left who still must be weeded out, tolerate the no-shows who haven't the courtesy to say "sayonara after all". and by the time it's time to meet someone, we may feel somewhat played out after all. Those of you who are not tragiy broken time wasters still seem to lack the follow through and certainly believe that we who are also not broken time wasters are the same. The problem is the exhaustion of the process as it is today. Most seem to be fantasizers who fail once faced with the realization of the connect. This is my experience this time around. It was not in times before. I am assuming that times have changed, or the fide users of this list have moved on to other venues. I do not find men to be people with follow through. And I find it exhausting to have to weed through so much garbage that the ones worth my time are too exhausted to make the connect. There are several of you out there still who have my energy that I am trying to recapture back for myself. You simply dropped away without a polite . I put out a lot of preparation for you, honestly. And got myself all pieced and parceled up by the others who were not real. In this, we all lose.
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